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ERB 100-Word Drabbles
APRIL IIIa Edition :: Days 16-30
Continued from Days 1-15
by Robert Allen Lupton
With Collations, Web Page Layout and ERBzine Illustrations and References by Bill Hillman
G.O.A.T.: GREATEST OF ALL TIME
April 16, 2021: On this day in 2012, Armchair Fiction & Music published an “Ace Double” style edition of two stories about beautiful women on other planets in our solar system. The two stories are “Captive of the Centaurianess” by Poul Anderson and “A Princess of Mars” by Edgar Rice Burroughs.
“Captive of the Centaurianess” was originally published in the March 1952 issue of Planet Stories. “She was the toughest dame this side of Jupiter. Dyann the Amazon from man-starved Alpha Centauri III, along with help from a Martian Scientist, embarks on a journey through space with Ray Ballantyne beyond the solar system and back again.
“A Princess of Mars" was originally published as ‘Under the Moons of Mars’ a hundred years earlier. The All-Story magazine serialized the novel from February through July in 1912.
Details about the publishing history of “A Princess of Mars” are available at: https://www.erbzine.com/mag4/0421.html
A portion of the blurb for “A Princess of Mars,” that accompanies this edition is featured as today’s drabble. Let’s call it "GOAT,” which stands for greatest of all time.
GOAT
PANTS ON FIRE
April 17, 2021: On this day in 1920, the fifth and final installment of "Tarzan and the Valley of Luna” was published by All-Story Weekly. “Tarzan and the Valley of Luna” was published in book form as the second half of “Tarzan the Untamed.” The first half of the novel was published by Blue Book Magazine in 1919 as ‘Tarzan the Untamed.”
All-Story Magazine didn’t include any interior illustrations for Valley of Luna, but P. J. Monahan illustrated the March 20, 2020 cover. The April 17, 1920 All-Story cover illustrated the first installment of the serialized novel, “Black Mail,” by Hulbert Footer (highly prolific writer with over 100 pulp adventures published). The issue included part two of the novel, “Clung,” by Max Brand. All-Story Magazine would be absorbed into Argosy three months after this issue and the combined magazine, “Argosy All-Story Weekly,” began publication on July 24, 2020.
Complete publishing details about “Tarzan and the Valley of Luna” are online at https://www.erbzine.com/mag4/0493.html
Today’s drabble is “Pants on Fire,” inspired by Haptmann Fritz Schneider, a character created by Edgar Rice Burroughs.
PANTS ON FIRE
Schneider stayed ahead of the apeman by disguising
himself, assuming new identities and, deceiving everyone he encountered.
Camby said, “Tarzan, he’s quite clever and it’s clear
that he still holds your wife hostage. You’ll never catch him.”
Tarzan replied, “Never is a long time. I only have to follow his trail of deceit. He’s doomed himself by his own behavior. Lies are the stock in trade of failure.”
LOST WORLD SING ALONG
April 18: On this day in 1921, Argosy began the serialization of “Jan of the Jungle,” by Otis Adelbert Kline. The cover was by Robert A. Graef.
Jan is raised in a laboratory and trained to be killer, but he escapes, along with a chimpanzee. The two discover a lost world with the remains of a three ancient civilizations, Mu, Lemuria, and Atlantis, along with a princess, and they have lots of adventures. The story was published in hardcover by Edward J. Clode Inc. in 1937, with a horribly plain cover and retitled “The Call of the Savage,” spawned a sequel, “Jan in India.” A 13 episode film serial titled “Call of the Savage” starred Noah Berry, Jr. and was released in 1935.
Kline, so I’ve read, claimed that “Jan” owed nothing to Tarzan, but that he was inspired by Kipling’s “Jungle Book” and Hudson’s “Green Mansions.”
The drabble for today is “Lost World Sing Along.” Hope you find it amusing.
LOST WORLD SING ALONG
“Hear them chant and sing. Warriors from Mu always chant as the march. Atlanteans move silently through the jungles. Both are dangerous to us.”
Jan said, “I’m a great mimic. I’ll sing like them and
they’ll believe us to be of their tribe.” Jan hummed for a moment and then
he produced a loud melodic yodel.”
The princess put her hand over his mouth. “Now you’ve
done it. You don’t sound anything like them. That wasn’t A –Mu- Sing.”
NAME THAT RHINO
April 19: On this day in 1934, the Washington Herald ran an article titled “Suggest Name for Film Star In New Contract.” The article states that Mary, the rhinoceros who appears in the film “Tarzan and His Mate” is unhappy with her name. A contest to find a new name for Mary is announced and first prize is $25.00 and ten tickets to see the movie. The trick is that your new name can only contain the letters in “Tarzan and His Mate.” The title has three A's, your name can have one A, two A’s, or three A’s, but not four. The rule applies to all other letters. For example, you can only use one S, but you can use two N's and two T's. My personal favorite is Zanana.
The article is available in its entirety at https://www.erbzine.com/mag11/1115.html
The drabble for today is “Name That Rhino,” and it features my old friends from New Orleans, Pat and John.
NAME THAT RHINO
Pat said, “Mary’s a marvel sure enough, but that name’s
taken.”
“Okay, Dharma, then.”
“A key concept in Indian religions, Buddhism, Hinduism,
Jainsm, and Sikhism; the eternal aspect of truth. There are no atheists
in front of a charging rhinoceros.”
“Never mind. I don’t think rhinoceroses are religious.
What’s your choice, Pat?”
“She’s a princess. I like Tzarina.”
“She’s not Russian.”
“John, angry rhinos are always rushin’ all over.”
WILD WOMAN
April 20: On this day in 1942, the Tarzan daily comic strip drawn by Rex Maxon and written by Don Garden began the story line, “The Return of Zeela.” “VisIting a town for the first time, Zeela, with her wild jungle ways, becomes involved with the police. In her cell she hears Tarzan’s distant ape-cry of distress and resolves to go to his aid.”
Zeela first appeared using the name, Tarzeela, on May 16, 1940 in the 258 day story, “Tarzeela, the Wild Girl," No reason is given for modifying her name,
The entire story, which ran for 90 days concluded on August 1, 1942, may be read at the following link:
The drabble for today is “Wild Woman,” inspired by the story line and by the lyrics to the song “Wild Woman,” by Imelda May, whom I thank for the use of some of her lyrics. Hear the song at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0aj1jdFQosQ
WILD WOMAN
“If the soldiers touch me, I’ll kill them.”
Tarzan’s yell rang in the nearby jungle. He called
for help.
Zeela said, “Tarzan needs me. I’ll leave now.”
“You’ll go nowhere.”
“There’s a wild woman living inside of me dying to
be free. I tried to tame her, but she fought me tooth and nail. Don’t try
to stop me, I really have to go.”
BE POSITIVE AND BE GRATEFUL
April 21: On this day in 1958, actress Andie MacDowell (Rosalie Anderson MacDowell) was born in Gaffney, South Carolina. Her first film was 1984’s “Greystoke: The Legend of Tarzan, Lord of the Apes.” Glenn Close dubbed her voice because the director said that Andie sounded too “Southern.” How sad for all of us.
She also starred in Groundhog Day, Short Cuts, Four Weddings and Funeral, and Multiplicity. She was a spokesperson for L’Oréal for over 30 years. I can't count the number of magazine covers she graced.
The drabble to today was written by Andie MacDowell. Call it “Be Positive and be Grateful.”
BE POSITIVE AND BE GRATEFUL
I always say that kindness is the greatest beauty that you can have. Grace isn’t a little prayer you say before a meal; it’s a way to live.”
BAD MAMA
April 22: On this day in 1916, The American Film Company, formerly known as the “American Film Manufacturing Company,” made the foresighted decision to turn down the opportunity to produce “Tarzan of the Apes,” The company, referred to as “Flying A Studios” because its logo was a winged capital A, went out of business in 1921. Good call, guys. During its brief lifespan, the company made over 150 films, mostly westerns and comedies.
The company’s best known actress was Mary Miles Minter, born Juliet Reilly. Beginning at age ten, she appeared in over fifty films including “Anne of Green Gables” in 1919. She was implicated in the murder of Director William Desmond Taylor, with whom she claimed a romantic relationship in spite of the 30 year age difference. The murder was never solved, but Minter’s career didn’t survive the scandal. Insiders believed that Minter’s mother, Charlotte Shelby, was actually Taylor’s lover and murderer. There’s a Shakespearian plot in there somewhere.
Considering the family dynamics at play in the household, it’s probably for the best that the “Flying A” didn’t produce Tarzan and that Minter never played Jane. What would Lord Greystoke have done if Jane’s mother was an evil woman?
Today’s drabble, “Bad Mama,” explores that possibility.
BAD MAMA
“Jane’s mother is welcome.”
Charlotte said, “Thank you, but there’ll need to be some changes. You have to stop hanging around with those monkeys. Stay away from that priestess in Opar. More fiber in the diet and we need some modern appliances. I’ll call the power company. The grass around your house should be shorter.”
Tarzan turned to Jane. “How did your father die?”
“He stepped in front of a bus."
“I see. What’s a bus and where’s the closest one?”
YOU AREN'T GOING OUT DRESSED LIKE THAT
April 23: On this day in 1983, Clarence Linden Crabbe II, known professionally as Buster Crabbe, died in Scottsdale Arizona. Crabbe was born in California, but spent most of his childhood in Hawaii. He attended USC and in 1932, won Olympic Gold in the 400 meter freestyle.
He was immediately cast as “Kaspa” in “King of the Jungle” and in 1933, Paramount Studios hired him to play Tarzan in “Tarzan the Fearless.” Crabbe made several westerns, many as Bill the Kid. He is best known, to me, at least, as Flash Gordon and Buck Rogers. He starred on television as Captain Gallant.
Crabbe appeared in over 100 films including “Jungle Man,” and “King of the Congo.”
Crabbe stayed in shape and had an amazing senior swimming career, setting 16 world records and 35 national records. In 1971, at age 63, he set an age group world record.
The drabble for today is “You Aren’t Going Out Dressed Like That.”
YOU AREN'T GOING OUT DRESSED LIKE THAT
“The films are very similar. Shoot ‘em ups are the same with six-guns, ray-guns, or jungle drums. It doesn’t matter whether I head them off at the pass, the moons of Mongo, or on the savannah, the bad guys always lose and I always win.”
“But if you had to choose.”“Westerns. At least I could wear my outfits out in public without causing a riot.”
IN THE JAWS OF THE LION
April 24: On this day in 1932, the Tarzan Sunday comic story, “The Lion Tamer,” sometimes called “Tarzan and the Lion Tamer,” began. The illustrations were by Hal Foster, of Prince Valiant fame, and the story was written by George Carlin (no, not that George Carlin). It ran for seven Sundays.
Tarzan visited a circus in France and while there, lightning struck the car carrying the lions. The lions became agitated, but their trainer, the beautiful Lenida, insisted on performing her act. She attempted to put her head in the red lion’s mouth and the creature mauled. Tarzan, dressed in tuxedo, lept from the stands and killed the lion. The apeman fled to the forest. Lenida survived the attack and months later was released from the hospital. She wore a mask to hide her face. She insisted upon returning her lions to Africa.
Once there, she and her lions were attacked by natives. Tarzan intervened. She saved herself and her lions by performing her act. None of the natives were brave enough to put their head in a lion’s mouth.
The drabble for today is “In the Jaws of the Lion,” inspired by the Sunday Tarzan comic, which was based on the Tarzan novels by Edgar Rice Burroughs.
IN THE JAWS OF THE LION
“I know, I mask my face because I was mauled by a lion.”
“You must be very brave to face the same danger again.
Are you not afraid?”
“A bit. I understand and respect the danger, but I
control my fear. Being brave is simply accepting the danger, facing down
your fear, and doing what needs to be done in spite of it.
ELEPHANT POWER
April 25: On this day in 1934, UCLA basketball star and actor, Denny Miller was born. Denny played Tarzan in Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer’s 1959 “Tarzan, the Ape Man,” opposite Joanna Barnes as Jane.
Denny was a regular guest star on many television series in the 1960’s and appeared as scout Duke Shannon for three years on ‘Wagon Train.” He lampooned his Tarzan role on Gilligan’s Island, playing Tongo, the ape man in the episode “Our Vines Have Tender Apes.”
He appeared as the Groton’s fisherman in commercials for 14 years and authored two books, an autobiography, “Didn’t You Used To Be …Wat’s His Name?” and “Toxic Waist?” about obesity in the United States.
A regular at Edgar Rice Burroughs gatherings, Denny was a charming individual. Glad to have met him. More details about Denny may be read at: https://www.erbzine.com/denny/
The drabble for today is “Elephant Power,” and it was taken from Denny’s autobiography.
ELEPHANT POWER
“Action!” pushed down firmly on the border glued on the elephant’s stomach. Do you know the difference between a cocktail lounge and an elephant’s fart? One is a barroom and one is a BAHHHROOOM!
Everyone but me, abandoned the set.
LAST MAN STANDING
April 25: On this day in 1992, the new episode of Balenciaga produced Tarzan TV series, which stared Wolf Larson as Tarzan and Lydie Denier as Jane, was “Tarzan and the Savage Storm." The French-Canadian-Mexican series was filmed in Mexico. The episode lasts 22 minutes.
In the syndicated episode, Tarzan and his friends tell stories while they wait out a storm. Jane’s ex-boyfriend, Jack, arrives during the storm seeking shelter. Jack has a questionable past – there’s something about bad boys – but he promises that he has changed, and he has, but for the worst. Jack is now trafficking in animals. Tarzan takes offense and puts a stop to Jack’s plans.
Adrian Paul, who played the Highlander for several years on television, played the role of Jack Traverse, Jane’s old boyfriend.
The photo for today isn’t the best but it’s the best I could do with a screen capture from the episode.
The drabble for today is “Last Man Standing,” inspired by the episode and by the works of Edgar Rice Burroughs.
LAST MAN STANDING
“Thank you! Hello, Jane. Good to see you again.”
“I hear frightened animals,” said Tarzan and went
outside into the rain to investigate.
He returned and threw several locks on the floor.
“Jack, I freed the animals that you had captured. Leave now, don’t make
me hurt you.”
“I wanted the money. I wanted Jane to love me again.”
“You wasted your time. There can be only one.”
UNDER THE SEA
April 27: On this day in 1948, “Tarzan and the Mermaids” premiered in Los Angeles. The release date and the date of the premier are different. The movie premiered in Los Angeles on April 27, 1948, but the release date in the United States for the 68 minute RKO Pictures film was May 15, 1948.
The film starred Johnny Weissmuller as Tarzan and Brenda Joyce as Jane. It was filmed in Mexico by RKO in collaboration with Churubusco Studios and was the first Tarzan movie filmed outside the United States since “The New Adventures of Tarzan.” Sadly, two crew members were killed during the production. One was crushed by a motorboat, and Angel Garcia, a stunt diver who actually did Tarzan’s high dive, survived the dive, but was swept by the high waves into the cliff face.
Details about the film are available at: https://www.erbzine.com/mag6/0628.html
The drabble for today, “Under the Sea,” and it was inspired by the film and bad mermaid jokes everywhere.
UNDER THE SEA
“I’d missed her. Long time, no sea. Besides, we were
only catching an Ester Williams film at the dive-in theater.”
“Yeah, buoy, I don’t mean to be crabby, for shore,
but speaking sharkly, it’s got to stop.”
“Sometimes, I have to seas the day.”
“I going to talk to her and tell her to leave you
alone. Where is she?”
Tarzan handed Jane a conch shell. “Under the sea,
but you can call her on her shellphone.”
PATIENCE IS POWER
April 28: On this day in 1964, Canaveral Press published a reprint of “The Lad and the Lion.” They put a blurb across the top of the dust jacket calling the book, “ERB’S RAREST BOOK.”
Like the first edition, the reprint used the same John Coleman Burroughs illustration on the dust jacket, except Canaveral printed the illustration in a monochromatic format.
Visit https://www.erbzine.com/mag7/0760.html for details about the novel, illustrations, and the film of the same name.
The first edition of the book was limited to 3500 copies. Grosset and Dunlap reprinted the book. Robert B. Zeuschner lists three hardcover editions, ERB Inc. G & D, and Canaveral; one Ballantine paperback, five Ace paperback variants, and 3 on demand printings by Pulpville / ERBville Press.
Joe Lukes, “Edgar Rice Burroughs Bibliography of ‘Pre-War Grosset and Dunlap Editions 1918-1942," lists one printing of the book in 1939, “The Lad and the Lion” was the last Burroughs book to be published by Grosset and Dunlap. They did publish additional printings of previously published works during and after WW2, but never printed “The Lad and the Lion” again.
Jimmie Goodwin lists 7 variants by Ace Books in his “Edgar Rice Burroughs The Descriptive Bibliography of the Ace and Ballantine/Del Rey Paperback Books." In all fairness, three of those variants are differentiated by the existence or the location of a Kent cigarette insert. Goodwin lists two Ballantine variants, one published in the United States and one published in Canada.
The drabble for today is “Patience is Power,” and it was inspired by “The Lad and the Lion." Remember, Courage isn’t only about roaring, it’s about not giving up. Courage is that little voice inside that at the end of today says, I’ll try again tomorrow.
PATIENCE IS POWER
Finally, the lion escaped and the beast and boy confronted
the old man.
The old man brandished a knife. “I have a weapon.”
Michael said, “I have a lion.” He turned to the beast.
“Patience is a virtue, but the time to meow is over, my friend. Today,
it’s time to roar.”
Years of patience exhausted, the lion attacked.
OXYMORON
April 29: On this day in 1945, the film, “Tarzan and the Amazons,” was released. Brenda Joyce replaced Maureen O’Sullivan, who’d played Jane in six previous films. Weissmuller reprised his role as Lord of the Jungle. Maria Ouspenskaya played the Amazon Queen. She’s best known for playing an old gypsy fortuneteller in 1941’s “The Wolfman,” and 1943’s Frankenstein Meets the Wolfman.” Her line when the Wolfman is dying was: “The way you walked was thorny, through no fault of your own, but as the rain enters the soil, the river enters the sea, so tears run to a predestined end. Now you will have peace for eternity.”
For more about the film, visit https://www.erbzine.com/mag6/0625.html
The drabble for today is “Oxymoron,” and it was inspired by the film, “Tarzan and the Amazons,” which was based on the books by Edgar Rice Burroughs.
OXYMORON
The Queen replied, “We fought the Trojan War and the Peloponnesian War. We fought the Scythians and won the battle of Thermodon, but the battles were endless. There was always another man out to conquer the world. We tired of being dragged into fighting foolish wars for men and sought peace in the Dark Continent.”
Jane said, “Some wars are fought for peace.”
‘Perhaps that’s true, but in my experience, fighting
for peace is like drinking for sobriety.”
April 30: On this day in 2007, Gordon Scott passed away in Baltimore, Maryland. Scott, who was born in Portland, Oregon as Gordon Merrill Werschkul, portrayed Tarzan in six films, one of which was compiled from the pilot and other episodes of a never broadcast television series: “Tarzan’s Hidden Jungle,” “Tarzan and the Lost Safari,” “Tarzan’s Fight For Life,” “Tarzan and the Trappers,” “Tarzan’s Greatest Adventure,” and “Tarzan the Magnificent.” Most of the films were filmed on location in Africa.
In his life after Tarzan, Scott made several “sword and sandal” films in Italy, appearing as Goliath, Samson, Remus, Julius Caesar, Zorro, and Hercules, He made two spaghetti westerns playing the lead in “Buffalo Bill, Hero of the far West, and Lon Cordeen in “The Tramplers.”
The man was a regular at Burroughs gatherings and always pleasant and friendly. He could tell one hell of a story.
The drabble for today is compiled from quotes attributed to Gordon Scott. Let’s call it “On Location.”
ON LOCATION
The natives over here think we’re a little crazy. I guess this one of the few spots in the world that had never heard of Tarzan. They can’t see any point to a fellow in a leopard skin swinging from tree to tree when it would be much simpler to cut your through the jungle with a knife.”
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